Truth or Dare Cullen Style
by BellissaAdreana
Summary: Emmett is annoying Bella so they make a deal saying the Cullens will play any game Emmet wants if he stops torturing Bella. What game will Emmet choose? And what happens when Alice invites another coven of animal-drinking vampires? After Breaking Dawn!
1. Edward is a meany!

Truth or Dare with the Cullens!

Introduction

"MY MILSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD!" Emmet was running around the house singing his new favorite song. "DAMN RIGHT! IT'S BETTA' THAN YOURS!" He had now stopped on the stairs and had his hand on his hips. "I CAN TEACH YOU, BUT I HAVE TO CHARGE!" Now he was shaking his hips.

He went into another round of the chorus again and I groaned. Edward stood up and said, "Emmet. First of all you don't have a 'milkshake'," He put quotes around milkshake, indicating that he meant something else, "And second of all, are those the only words you know to the song?" Emmet was now looking at Edward like he was crazy.

"OF COURSE I HAVE A BOOBS! EDWARD THAT IS SO MEAN! WHY WOULD YOU EVER SAY THAT TO ANYONE!? THAT IS SO INSULTING!" Now I was cracking up on the couch laughing. Emmet with boobs? The image was just to funny.

"APOLOGIZE YOU JERK!" Emmet looked like one of those cartoon kids look like when they yell with their head thrown up and eyes closed. That thought just sent me into another fit of giggles.

"Fine. I'm sorry Emmet. Now can you please be quiet?"

"OH! SO NOW YOU ARE INSULTING MY SINGING! GOD, EDWARD! YOU ARE A HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PERSON!" Emmet was fake crying now.

"Emmet! Stop! Get up here now!" Rosalie was standing at the top of the steps looking down at Emmet. Then an all too familiar song was heard outside. It was the ice-cream man.

"ICE CREAM! I SCREAM, YOU SCREAM, WE ALL SCREAM FOR ICE CREAM!" Emmet was jumping up and down. I rolled my eyes.

I looked away for two seconds and when I looked up, the glass to the back of the house was shattering and Emmet was running through the glass. Now it was Rosalie's turn to groan.

"So. Who's going to go with Rosalie this time to get the big goon?" Alice smiled and winked at Rosalie.

"I will." I offered. Just because I wanted to see what Emmet wanted ice-cream for.

"Thanks." Rosalie said. We ran out of the house and spotted Emmet running up towards the ice-cream truck... _at human speed_. What?

He was panting and screaming, "WAIT FOR ME! STOP! I WANT ICE CREAM!" Rosalie sat down on the side of the road and put her head in her hands. I suppressed my urge to giggle.

Emmet finally caught up to the ice-cream truck and walked up to the window. He reached into his pocket and a look of surprise took over his face.

"DAMN! I FORGOT MONEY!" He turned to face me with puppy dog eyes. "Bella? Do you have any money?" I handed him a five and rolled my eyes.

"I want one of those like Spongebob shaped popsicles! You know! The one with the bubble-gum as eyes!?" Oh my god. What. An. Idiot. Emmet handed the ice cream man the money and got his ice cream.

Once the truck drove away, Emmet looked at me and said, "Bella? What am I supposed to do with it now?"

A/N- Okay, I know this doesn't have truth or dare in it but it was just the introduction. I thought I'd just get you used to Emmet's outbursts that will be happening frequently during the truth or dare section! Reviews please!


	2. Meet the Cathals!

Chapter 2

After Emmet had decided to take his ice cream and smush it all over me, Carlisle and Esme left to go hunting. They said that they would be gone for 2 days and told Emmet to behave. Like that will ever happen. So I went upstairs to take a shower and get the ice cream out of my hair. I was so consumed in how relaxing the shower was that I didn't notice the sound of my bathroom door opening and closing.

Eventually I realized that I had been in the shower a long time so I turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. I went to grab a towel off the rack but grabbed nothing... _What?_

That's when I heard it. Emmet was downstairs snickering. I was immediately panicked. _Oh god, what did he do this time?!_ Then I reached down to where I put my fresh clothes and, again, felt nothing.

"EMMET! GIVE ME MY CLOTHES BACK!" Then I heard Emmet's booming laugh. I was raging mad and all I wanted to do was rip someone's throat out. I reached out with my shield to find Edward's, Alice's, or Renesmee's sparks and eventually found Edward's. I then lifted my shield off of me and yelled out with my mind, _EDWARD! HELP ME! EMMET TOOK MY CLOTHES!_

Withing 2 seconds, Edward was walking in my door. He threw my clothes and a towel at me and ran downstairs to punish Emmet. I no longer heard hysterical laughing coming from downstairs. I got dressed and ran down to the living room.

"Bella! Bella! Bella! BELLA!" Alice was screaming. "We invited friends over and we're all going to play truth or dare! Doesn't that sound fun?!" She was jumping up and down with excitement. Jake and Renesmee were sitting in a corner of the room laughing and giggling.

Nessie had finally grown up as much as she could and Jacob finally told her he was in love with her and ever since, I couldn't get him out of the house.

"Sure, Alice. Who did you invite?" If she invited the Denalis, I don't think I would be having much fun.

"Oh! They're a new group and they're sooo nice Bella! The father and mother's names are Rylan and Ailey and their kid's names are Adreana and Derek, Adeen and Kennedy, and Keelyn and Shaun! Their last name is Cathal and they're Irish! Isn't that so cool?! But, we're not going to be meeting Rylan and Ailey because they met up with Carlisle and Esme to go hunting!"

"That's great, Alice. When will they be here?" As soon as I asked the question, I heard the doorbell ring.

"Ooh! That's them!" Alice ran over to the door and threw it open. Six teenagers stood there, looking as beautiful as any vampire.

"Hi! I'm Alice and this is my family! Bella and Edward, Rosalie and Emmet, Jasper and me, and Renesmee and Jacob!" She pointed to each of us as she said our name. The one with brown and blond hair sniffed the house and made a funny face.

"Oh! You're going to have to get over the disgusting dog s hit smell. That's our new pet. Renesmee insisted on getting a _dog_." Rosalie was staring at Jacob now with pure hatred only Rosalie could feel.

"Don't mind Rosalie. She doesn't like Jacob. He's like a shift shaping werewolf. We also can't get him to leave. So... Hi again!" Alice basically jumped on the brown/blond haired girl to hug her.

"Oh. Uh.... Hi." The pretty brown/blond girl disentangled herself from Alice and stepped into the house while her family followed her. "I'm Adreana. This is Derek." She pointed to a cute boy with black hair that curled at the end. "And this is Adeen and Kennedy, and Keelyn and Shaun." She pointed to each couple. I immediately took a liking to both Adreana and Keelyn. But there was something about Keelyn that made slowly shift toward her. She was like a magnet of happiness.

"Well come on in! We wanted to play truth or dare and thought it would be more fun with other people to play with us!" Alice was still excited.

After that, we seemed to sort of group off to talk to someone. Edward and I talked to Adreana and Derek. Adeen and Rosalie hit it off as soon as they both pulled out the same compact to look at themselves. Keelyn and Alice were a perfect match. They were both lively, energetic, and full of happiness.

We didn't start playing truth or dare until I got curious and decided to ask a silly question.

"Alice. Why are we playing truth or dare? Why not anything else?" Edward, Rose, Jasper, and Emmet were in hysterics after I said that. Alice was smiling and everyone else looked confused.

"We agreed that Emmet could choose the game we played and who we invited over if he agreed to stop torturing you." I groaned. _Oh great._ Now Emmet _could_ torture me with out anyone being able to stop him. U_gh!_  
Edward wrapped his arm around my shoulder and chuckled lightly with the Cathals. Well, this is going to be a looong night.

A/N- Still, no truth or dare... SORRY! I had to find a way to start the truth or dare thing! DON'T WORRY! Next chapter will be the start of their game! Reviews please!


	3. Make out with Emmet or pudding?

Chapter 3

"HEY! HEY! BELLA! GUESS WHAT?!" Emmet was getting excited before the game had even started. Of course, I had to be an idiot and ask what.

"What, Emmet?"

"I HAVE A NEW FAVORITE SONG! WANNA HEAR IT?!" Emmet was jumping up and down now.

"Actually, Emmet, I think we should just start playing the game." Alice chirped in.

"NO! Bella needs to hear my song! She just HAS to!" Emmet jumped up on the kitchen table and started dancing. _What the-_

"When I grow up  
I wanna be famous  
I wanna be a star,  
I wanna be in movies

When I grow up  
I wanna see the world  
Drive nice cars  
I wanna have BOOBIES!"

"DO YOU WANT BOOBIES BELLA?! CAUSE I HAVE 'EM AND YOU DON'T! HAH! HOW BOUT THEM APPLES GIRRRRL!" My mouth formed a perfect O. What. Just. Happened?

Edward slowly took his arm off my should and started walking toward Emmet with his fists clenched. Then Adreana bursted out laughing. Edward stopped. Huh? Why was she laughing?

"He... said... and boobies... and you... perfect O..." She was laughing in between each word and all of a sudden everyone was laughing along with her. Including me.

"Okay you guys. Let's start playing. Everyone knows how to play truth or dare, right?" Alice really wanted to start playing. We all nodded our heads.

"Alright. Everyone take a seat in the living room." Alice walked over and sat on Jasper's lap in the big single couch. Edward pulled me over to the four-person couch and sat me on his lap. Rose and Emmet took the love seat with Rose laying across Emmet. Adreana and Derek sat next to us with Derek's arm draped around Adreana's shoulder while Adeen and Kennedy mirrored them. Keelyn and Shaun sat next to each other on the floor next to our couch and Jacob and Renesmee sat on the floor across from our couch.

"So. I'll start with... Rosalie!" Alice said. "Truth or Dare?"

Rosalie looked skeptic and said, "Truth."

We all groaned because that is what _everyone_ chose. Unoriginal much?

"Fine. I had a good dare for you though." Alice pouted. "Okay! I have a good one! Rosalie, would you rather-"

"MAKE OUT WITH ME OR PUDDING?!" Emmet yelled. Rosalie hit him in the head and looked at Alice pointedly.

"Okay. As I was saying... Would you rather have your head shaved or loose your fashion sense?" Alice was evil. She knew Rosalie well enough to know that this would kill-

"I'd rather shave my head." Everyone stared at her. "What? No matter what I do, I'll always look sexy." Alice rolled her eyes and Emmet smiled.

"Of course you would, sex goddess." Emmet commented. Rosalie smiled at her new nickname and started making out with Emmet.

"GOD! It's enough to HEAR you call her a sex goddess but you don't need to SHOW US!" We all cracked up at Jacob's response to their PDA.

"Shut up, pup!" Rosalie looked at him.

"Hey Rose?" Jacob was faking innocence now.

"What?!"

"Is it true that blonds-"

"Don't you dare make a stupid blond joke you idiot!"

"Okay! Stop you two! Rose. It's your turn to pick someone!" Jasper was flinching from the pain of the hatred in the room when Alice saved him by stopping their bickering.

"Fine. Adeen. Truth or dare?" We all looked at Adeen.

"Dare." That took me by surprise. This little red-head was going to make our night interesting.

"Okay. Um... Oh! I got one!" We all looked at Rose. Hopefully this wouldn't be anything stupid... "You have to go to this kid Mike Newton's house and convince him that Bella and Edward are divorced at Bella has finally fallen in love with him!" What? What kind of an idiot dare was that? What the hell?

"Okay. Where does the kid live?" Then, before I knew it, we were standing in front of Mike Newton's house behind a bush. Adeen decided to dress in a skimpy little outfit to make Mike oggle at her.

She walked up to the door and knocked on it a few times. Mike cam out and looked at Adeen. I heard his heart pace quickening and his breath hitched. Kennedy tensed beside me and the rest of us laughed silently.

"He is imagining having sex with Adeen" Edward whispered in my ear. That just made the rest of us laugh harder and cover our mouths to keep from making noise. Kennedy's eyes went black and Adreana was restraining him from killing Mike.

"Uh... Can I... Uh... Help you?" Mike was speechless. It was hilarious.

"Yes. I'm looking for a certain Mike Newton?" Mikes eyes raked Adeen's body, hungrily.

"That's me." He spoke directly to her breasts.

"Oh good." She purred into his ear. "I have important news for you. It involves Bella." Edward tensed.

"What Edward?" I whispered to my love.

"He's... _thinking_ about you. Sexually." Edward's eyes were the ones to turn black now. I knew I had to distract him to keep him from killing Mike, so I turned around and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. It worked perfectly so I pulled away and turned back to watching Mike.

"What... What about Bella?" Mike asked.

"Well. Her and dear Edward had a fight about someone. They had to get a divorce." Adeen stepped back from purring in Mike's ear and looked at him. Curiosity was written all over his face.

"What does that have to do with me?" Mike was obviously thinking about trying to hook up with me now. I didn't need a mind-reader to figure that one out.

"Well... She confided in me her undying love for you." Whoa. Maybe she was taking things a little too far...

"Love?" Mike squeaked.

"Yes. But you must convince her you are worthy. She told me the only way to do that was if, next time you see her, you whisk her away and seduce her." Mike's eyes widened and a wicked grin appeared on his face. _Oh great_.

"Thank you for the information..." Mike ran back into his house.

I had been so caught up in what happened that I didn't notice Edward leave me and start walking up to Mike's bedroom window.

"EDWARD! DON'T YOU DARE!" Alice ran up and attempted to tackle Edward. Emmet and Jasper immediately caught up on what Edward was going to do so they helped Alice pull Edward back to the street.

"Eddie! Don't do that to poor Mikey-wikey!" Emmet was cuddling Edward to his chest and everyone was staring at him like WTF?!

"Emmet...?" Rose looked at Emmet confused. Then she looked at Edward... jealous? At this I bursted out laughing. Edward chuckled, reading Rosalie's mind and Jasper laughed, picking up her mood.

"Rose, are you _jealous_?" Asked Edward. He then, cuddled closer to Emmet while Emmet played along by stroking Edward's hair... _Awkward much?!_

"Yes, Edward. I'm so jealous of my brother getting ready to have _sex_ with my husband." Rosalie snapped. With that, Edward and Emmet pulled away. Apparently, they didn't think it was awkward until Rosalie thought they were going to have sex.

"Okay everyone! Let's get back home so Adeen can choose someone!" Alice decided to break the awkwardness. Emmet whispered to Adeen and she smiled. Of course I was too busy staring at Edward to notice...

"I don't think we have to go home for this next one..." Adeen turned her head to me and smiled like a maniac. _Oh no._

A/N- Hmmmm... What is Adeen planning for Bella now? And why does it involve them staying right where they are IN FRONT OF MIKE'S HOUSE?! O0o0o0o0o0o. That might have given out a little too much information though... Oh well! Reviews please!


	4. Why is it so TINY?

Chapter 4

"Bella. Truth or Dare." Adeen eyed Jasper quickly and I suddenly felt the over-powering urge to choose dare. So. Jasper was in on Adeen and Emmet's wicked plan, too.

"DARE!" Damnit! I can't believe I just said that. Great.

"Bella?" Edward looked at me worried. I muttered a few things as a response to Edward's asking. I'm pretty sure all he caught was, "Emmet... damn plans... jasper... damn powers." Edward chuckled softly. That is, until he heard what Adeen and Emmet were thinking. Or at least that's what I thought he stopped laughing at.

"Bella. I dare you to..." And she plunged into all of the details of her evil plan. **(A/N-You didn't seriously think I was going to tell you her dare? NO! You have to wait and read!)**

*******

I could not believe Jasper! Why would he help them with this?! What would make him want to see me suffer like this?! Didn't he realize that Edward would end up attacking Mike! I swear, I live with a bunch of idiots!

"Alright you're all ready Bella!" Alice had quickly gone home and grabbed the skimpiest pajamas she could find.**(A/N-Link on profile!****)** Thank God I had thrown out all of the other lacey pajamas from the honeymoon! This was going to be pure torture.

"Edward, maybe you should go home and... wait for us to come back. I don't think this will turn out good if you're here and you start reading Mike's mind..." Edward and I were sitting on Mike's window sill, figuring how to get me in for my dare.

"Edward! She's right you know!" Alice was on the ground looking at Eward worriedly.

"You probably are right. I don't want to kill Mike..." Edward looked down at the ground and all of a sudden Emmet was sitting next to me. I groaned.

"Eddie you need to go home. Not because I'm afraid you'll kill Mike because I actually wouldn't mind that happening. I just don't want you to get carried away when Bella's done with this and she comes to kiss you. Alice said that with Bella's outfit on, you're going to end up ripping it off of her the minute she leaves Mike's house. And no offense, Bella, but I'd rather only see Rosalie naked. Not you." My eyes widened at what Emmet had just said.

"Emmet! Get your big butt down here right now! That was totally uncalled for!" Rosalie was stomping her foot and pointing to the ground. Emmet jumped down and gave me a thumbs up before heading into the tree with Rosalie that the rest of my family and the Cathals were in. I could faintly see their heads popping out of the tree to see what was going on. I giggled to myself.

"They're right. I would feel so bad if I killed Mike." Edward sighed and pecked me on the cheek. "I'll see you at home, love." He quickly jumped off of the window sill and started running away.

I quietly snapped open the window and hopped inside Mike's room. Then I stopped dead in my tracks. Across all of his walls were thousands of pictures of 'Star Wars' posters! I looked at his ceiling and there was a giant- and I mean GIANT- picture of a guy in all black with a black helmet. The words next to him said "Darth Vader". Then, I looked at his bed sheets and of course found sheets with Obi Wan Kenobi all over them. I fell on the floor and started laughing. This was just too much. I mean, I knew Mike was a dork but _seriously_! Star Wars?!

Once I got over my fit of giggles I heard Mike walking up the stairs. I jumped onto his desk and crossed my legs, waiting for him to come into his room. I still couldn't believe they were making me do this!

The door slowly opened and Mike came in. I looked at what he was wearing and was almost on the floor, laughing silently. Really, could this boy have any more Star Wars things? He was wearing Star Wars _pajamas_ for God's sake! I quickly controlled myself and sat up straight again. Mike hadn't seen me yet.

He turned on the lights and looked around the room. His eyes stopped on me and he quickly blinked. Then he caught sight of what I was wearing.

"Hey there." I said in my most seductive voice possible. I could hear the snickering of my family outside and I mentally rolled my eyes.

"B-Bella?" Mike was still looking at my outfit. _Ugh, what a Star Wars obsessed perve_.

"Yes, Mike. It's me." I was still speaking in my seductive tone but mentally, I was slapping myself.

"Oh. Um... W-What are you d-doing here?" He still seemed at lost for words.

"Just looking for you." I giggled "flirtatiously" and winked at him.

"Oh. Uh. Well. I'm... here?" It came out as a question so I stood up and jumped on his bed and patted the spot next to me. _Ugh, this is gross._ I heard more snickering coming from outside and ignored it. Emmet was having a lot of fun watching this through the window.

Mike shook his head and came over and picked me up. I'm sure my facial expression was hilarious because I heard Emmet burst out laughing. Then I heard a thump and a mumbled apology.

Before I knew it, I was in Mike's closet. _What the Hell?_ I felt him straddle me. _Okay. Ew... gross. Only girls straddle boys._

"Mike. You might want to go get changed out of your clothes first." I was just trying to get him out of the room so I could make a run for it.

"Good idea!" Mike got off of me and ran out of the closet to the bathroom. I quickly dashed up and flew out of the window. I couldn't stand to be in there any longer.

"Bella!" Adeen grabbed my arm and pulled me into the tree. "You were supposed to wait until he got completely undressed before you fled!" Adeen was totally serious.

"I couldn't stand it anymore, Adeen! Sorry!" I didn't feel like fighting. I just wanted to see what happened when Mike came back into his room and found I was gone.

"Okay. Whatever. Look!" Adeen pointed to Mike in his room. He was completely naked. _Oh! Ew! So gross! Why is it so __tiny_?! We all bursted out laughing when Mike realized I wasn't in the closet. Then I saw the door open again and almost died of laughter when his mom came in the room and saw him naked!

Emmet was jumping up and down laughing-if that's even possible in a tree- and whispering, "I'M A GENIOUS, I'M A GENIOUS," over and over.

"Alright you guys! Edward is planning on coming over here if we don't hurry up! Let's go!" Alice grabbed Jasper and we all ran after them to our house.

**A/N- So... This chapter was kind of hard... And funny doesn't come easily to me! It took a looong time to wright these 4 chapters! Anyway, review and tell me who Bella should dare next and what she should dare them! Thanks:)**


	5. Ideas please?

A/N

Okay you guys, I really didn't want to post one of these! But I'm already running out of ideas for Dares!(And questions for Truth!) I need ideas. So I'm not posting the next chapter(which I have already written) until you guys give me ideas! I really don't want to be so mean but I REALLY need dares! So review with ideas!

-BellissaAdreana

P.S.- Don't make fun of me, I'm still new here! But I have a question!(that is going to make me sound like an idiot!) So... What are PMs?


	6. Annoying Song

**Chapter 5**

We arrived home at the same time we saw Edward hop into his Volvo. I don't think he saw us(or heard us) so I quickly ran over and tapped on his window. He jumped in his seat and looked up with a surprised look. He opened the door and swiftly pulled me into his arms.

"Hello, love." He whispered into my ear. I would have blushed at that but thank God I can't.

"EDWARD! REMEMBER! I DON'T WANNA SEE BELLA NAKED!" Emmet called over to us. That got him a smack from Rose and I giggled softly.

Then I heard Edward growl. I looked up at him, surprised. Why was he growling? Maybe it was something Emmet was thinking...

"What, Edward?" I looked up, trying to dazzle him. I think it worked because he stopped breathing for a few seconds.

"I just got a glimpse of what happened to you at Mike's from Emmet." He grabbed my hand and lead me into the house. I ran upstairs to the extra closet Alice got me and got changed into a comfy pair of jeans and tee-shirt. I ran backstairs to find everyone sitting where they were sitting before. That's when I realized it would be my turn to dare someone.

I sat down on Edward's lap and he whispered in my ear, "Choose Jasper. He won't get mad if it's something too outrageous." Nobody looked at Edward or me so I guessed they didn't hear what he had just said. Alice's eye's shot up and I guessed she had got a glimpse of me choosing Jasper.

"Jasper? Bella chose you!" Alice jumped up and down in his lap.

"Oh. Ok. Bella?" Jasper looked at me.

"Truth or Dare?" I asked, confidently.

I heard a sigh from him and he said, "Truth." Everyone groaned. _Greaaaat..._

"Oh... Uhm..." I looked at Edward and lifted off my shield, showing him what I was going to ask Jasper. He nodded his head slightly. I let my shield back around my mind and asked Jasper the question.

"If anyone in this room could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would you make them do?" Emmet snickered, probably thinking something nasty and Alice smiled, seeing the future. Then she shot a glance at Emmet.

"Oh! That's easy. I would make Emmet my slave and have him clean up after any kind of wrestling match we had." I laughed. Jasper and Emmet always broke something whenever they had their matches and then they would fight over who would have to clean it up.

"Okay! Now you choose someone Jasper!" Alice pecked Jasper on the cheek.

"Emmet." He looked at Emmet deviously.

_**Emmet's POV(I'll only do this when I feel the chapter needs to be funny!)**_

La dee da dee da dee daaa! Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the waaaay! Oh what fun it is to ride in a... one... horse... open SLEEEEIIIGH!

This game is so boring when there's not a funny dare going on... Wait. What was Bella's question again? Oh yeah. Who would you want for a slave for a day and what would you make them do? And she asked Jasper. Hehe. I know what I would have _my_ slave(Rosalie) do! Rosalie would be trapped in my room all day as my slave! Hehe -dirty thoughts-

I looked at Edward and saw his face in pain. He gave me a look, telling me to stop thinking my dirty thoughts. Hm. Fine. I'll think about Bella doing-

Edward shot a _reaaaally _scary glare at me... Okay. Never mind on the whole Bella thing... Maybe I can turn Edward _on_ by picturing Bella strip-

Oops! I got an even scarier look from Edward. Fine. I'll go back t o singing Jingle Bells.

"Emmet." Wait... Whaaa? Who called my name? I looked over at Jasper and he had this devil-looking face on.

"Who said my name?" I looked around and saw Bella smack her forehead. Why does she think I'm an idiot? I just get sidetra-

"OOH! BIRDY! EDWARD THERE IS A _BIRD_ OUTSIDE! WHOAA!" I jumped up and down. Why is this bird so special? You might be asking. Because I said so! Don't question the almighty Emmet!

"Emmet... Can't you just... _stop thinking_. It's painful listening to you think." Well that wasn't very nice. Edward is so mean! He shot me a look saying he didn't care.

_Well you are! Earlier today you were even criticizing my boobies! Why would you even be looking there Eddie-kins? I thought you were married! _I snickered. I loved having Edward being able to read what I was thinking sometimes... Other times?... Not so much.

"Emmet. Just pick truth or dare." Everyone was looking at me like I was crazy! What did I do? It's not like I just _randomly_ stood up and screamed because I saw a bird!

"Dare!" I was always the daring type.

"Okay. You have to run around Bella's old house's neighborhood screaming the Annoying Song." Annoying Song? What was that? And how come I wasn't aware of a song so annoying it was named the Annoying Song? **(A/N- And I think you know what song I'm talking about! If not, be glad you've never heard it before!)**

"What Annoying Song?" Everyone groaned. Wow. This song _must_ be annoying! Woohoo! This is gonna be great! Once I learn it, I can annoy Edward with it by screaming it in my head! Yes! Jasper stood up and started singing it. The lyrics weren't annoying. Just the tune. This song is amazing!

**Annoying Song:**

**I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves  
****I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves  
****And this is how it goes!**

**I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves  
****I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves  
****And this is how it goes!**

**(Repeat until the people next to you scream their heads off!)**

Wow! I love this song! It is sooo cool! I started singing it in my head, getting Edward annoyed who got Jasper mad. When Edward gets annoyed, it's a burning kind of annoyance. At least that's what Jasper says. He doesn't really like it when he has to feel Edward's annoyance. Hehe. I'm evil. I'm able to get two vampires upset just by singing a song in my head!

"Oh. And Emmet. There's something else that I wanted to add onto the dare. Jasper, may I?" Edward stood up and that caused Bella to pout because she was no longer sitting on Edward's lap. She was sitting on the couch with her arms crossed. My little sister is so hilarious. I almost forgot what Edward said until Jasper spoke up.

"Sure. Why not?"

"Okay Emmet. You have to do it in your boxers. And you have to wear a pair of Rosalie's underwear on your head." Edward and Jasper smirked at me while Rose's eyes widened. Guess she didn't want to share her man's sexy 'bod with the other people in Bella's old house's neighborhood... Hehe. I love my Rose. Always thinking about me.

"Why does it have to be _my _underwear?! Why not anyone else's?! His head is to big for my _thongs!_" Or she was thinking about her underwear. Oh well. I would be too... I wonder what a thong feels like when you wear it... Ouch. Looks like it hurts... I saw Edward grimace at my train of thought. Then he gave me a weird look and I just smiled sheepishly. Hehe.

"Because Alice's _definitely_ won't fit Emmet's huge, empty head and Edward will attack me if I let Emmet wear Bella's." Jasper had good reasoning... Wait did he just call my head empty? Nahh... He was talking about someone else. I wonder who has the same sexy name as me? Hm.

"Fine." Rosalie crossed her arms and ran upstairs to get one of her thongs. Wait. Why is she getting a thong again? I promised I wouldn't rip anymore of them off of her before we do it... so why does she need an extra one?

.....OH! Right! The dare! Hehe. Woops. Guess I forgot about that. I told you I get sidetracked easily... Ooh! There's Rosalie! Time for the dare!

We hopped into different cars and drove to Charlie's house. This was going to be fun. But what if Charlie doesn't like me after this? I can't have my little sister's dad not liking me!

"He's over at Billy's house, watching the game. We're all going into Bella's old house first so you can strip down to your boxers. Then you have to run around the neighborhood two or three times before we go home." Hehe. I giggled when he said strip. Hehe. They wanted me to give them a strip show? Hehe. Edward smacked his forehead.

We walked into Charlie's house/Bella's old house(since she lives with Edward at night... because I'm sure Charlie's house can't handle _their_ games at night! Hehe) and Rose handed me my- I mean her- underwear. I put it on my head and stripped down to my boxers.

"I'm ready!"

"Ugh. Man, that is gross!" We all turned to Jake, surprised. I guess we all forgot he was here with Renesmee. Oops.

"Shut up, pup! My husband is adorable in his boxers!" Rose hit the dog and came over to peck me on my lips. Mmmm... She tasted delicious.

"Okay! Let's get this show on the road!" Adeen and Keelyn were standing next to Rose and Alice giggling. Adeen was too controlling. I didn't like her very much.

"Okay." I left the house and started singing the Annoying Song. Hehe. This was fun. I heard people groaning and saying "Damn kids" from their houses the first time around. The second time around, they left their beds to look out the window. The third time around, I was chased by anyone's dog if they had one. I _hated_ dongs.

I decided to stop in front of Lauren Mallory's house on the third time around. I remember her being extremely mean to Bella during high school. It's time for payback...

I launched into a different song now. It was similar to to the "Milkshake song"(as Bella now calls it) from earlier. Only the words were different. I had heard some stupid kid call a radio station and sing this to the guys.

"MY POKEMON BRINGs ALL THE NERDS TO MY YARD," I started screaming my head off. My family and the Cathals noticed I was singing a different song now so they came out from hiding and were about to stop me until Edward read my mind to find out why I was doing this to Lauren's house and stopped them. "THEY'RE LIKE, 'I WANNA TRADE CARDS,' I'M LIKE, 'MINE ARE BETTA THAN YOURS. I CAN TEACH YOU BUT I CHARGE HARD!'" Bella looked wide-eyed at me. I'm guessing she recognized the "melody" from earlier.

"Emmet?" Adreana looked at me, scared.

"Hm?" I asked.

"There is a really pissed girl standing behind you..." I turned around and saw Lauren looking at me pissed. Hehe. Then she saw who was behind me and got a dazed look on her face. She started walking towards Edward. So I, the mighty vampire Emmet, decided to save the day.

"WOMANIZER, WOMAN, WOMANIZER, YOU'RE A WOMANIZER, OH! WOMANIZER, YOU'RE A WOMANIZER BABY!" I bursted out singing my favorite Brittney Spears song. This song is just amazing. Crap. I forgot the rest of the words! Oh well. I'll just sing my favorite part again! "WOMANIZER, WOMAN, WOMANIZER, YOU'RE A WOMANIZER, OH! WOMANIZER, YOU'RE A WOMANIZER BABY!" Finally! It worked! Lauren turned around, screamed, and stomped back inside her house.

"We better get out of here. She's going in to wake up her dad and get his gun..." Edward looked at me. But this is fun. Fine. We ran back to Charlie's house to grab my clothes and the cars. This is fun. I wonder who I'm going to dare next... Muahahahahahahaha!

**A/N- Haha. I love Emmet. Don't you? His thoughts are just so... random! Next chapter might be in Edward's POV so you can hear what everyone is thinking! Then it will go back to Bella and change to Emmet when I don't think the chapter is funny enough! Oh yeah and this was the chapter I already had written... Whoever has an idea for a dare that I like, I'll dedicate the next chapter to you! Reviews please!**


	7. Be safe!

**A/N- I freaking love you guys! Okay, so I thought I'd maybe respond to some things you guys said because... well... I want to! Haha. Okay.**

**Invisible Truths & Mitchy: **I did realize I spelled Emmett wrong. When you said that I was like... WTF?! I TOTALLY SPELLED THAT RIGHT! Then I saw I spelled it wrong and was like, "I could have sworn..." Anyway, I was typing this chapter and guess what? Every time I spell "Emmett" my computer thinks it's a mistake and changes it to "Emmet"! But I fixed it!

**Jessica: **Yeah, Emmett is actually smart... but I decided it would make the story more funny if I stretched Emmett's character a lot! XD

**All of the people who wanted Edward to be dare in this chapter: **Sorry! He's not being dared in this chapter! But it _will_ be in his POV! I promise he'll be the next one dared!

**Okay! So... don't kill me! Edward _will_ be the next one dared! Anyways, I saw this review for chapter 2 that made me laugh! It was hilarious! Here's the review:**

**darkmoon999**- This chapter is amazing, especially how all the Cullens, save Nessie, are downing Jake! Its like, now that you have a person who loves you, leave!

Haha! Did that make anyone else laugh? Thanks **darkmoon999**!

**So, I told you that I would dedicate this chapter to the person who helped me come up with my next dare and so I dedicate this chapter to... -drum rolls- _BROOKEGIRL101_! Hehe! Your idea was amazing and just so... something Emmett would choose as a dare! Anyways...**

**ONWARDS!**

**Chapter 6**

**Edward POV**

_Hehe. This is going to be the best dare! Wait. What time is it? Ten P.M.? Hey, Eddie? Since it's Friday will the mall be open this late?_ Emmett. Good lord, that boy needs help.

"Yes the mall will be open Emm-" I started.

"THE MALL?! ARE WE GOING TO THE MALL! YAAAAY!" Alice squealed. _Ohmygod! I can go shopping! And get Bella new clothes! And me! I need a new dress! Maybe I can get one of those family pictures with my siblings! That would be so cool!_ Alice kept planning out a shopping trip in her head.

"Well. The mall is staying open until midnight tonight. Something about its 20th Anniversary or something." How does Adeen know so much about this stuff? She doesn't even live here. Bella tensed up next to me. She probably just realized that Alice was planning out a shopping trip. I wrapped my arms around Bella and whispered in her ear.

"Don't worry, love. We'll only stay there until the dare is over."

"Yeah. But knowing Emmett he's probably going to dare me to go on a shopping trip with Alice for the two more hours it's open Then Alice will convince the stores and the mall to stay open until she thinks we are done." Bella has a point. But I just kissed her softly and looked at Emmett.

"Choose someone Emmett." He was still singing the Annoying Song in his head. Why did we ever teach this boy that song?

"Okay. Jake!" Wow. Didn't see that one coming. Everyone except for Alice, who had clearly read the future, looked at Emmett confused. "Come here boy! Come one puppy, don't be shyyyy! Truth or Dare boy?" Bella started giggling and Rose smiled, thinking about how much she hated the dog.

"JUST BECAUSE I'M A WEREWOLF DOEN'T MEAN I'M A DOG! AND I HAVE FEELINGS TOO YA KNOW!" We all cracked up from that. Jacob was visibly shaking until Nessie quickly pecked him on the cheek. I stopped laughing and glared at Jake. If he does _anything_ to my daughter I will hunt him down. And Bella won't hesitate to help.

"Just choose truth or dare!" Keelyn shouted. _Hehe. He looks so upset. I bet Rosalie is getting a kick outta this!_ Keelyn was giggling in her mind.

"Fine. Dare." Emmett burst out laughing. I got a glimpse of the dare and started laughing along with him. Alice joined in after about a second.

"Oh Jacob, this is going to be great!" Alice giggled. Bella looked up at me questioningly. I shook my head. She'll just have to wait and find out.

"Okay!" Emmett ran upstairs and I heard him getting the props for the dare. I snickered. Why do we even have this stuff? Emmett came back downstairs holding something wrapped in foil. Jake's eyes widened.

"Uh. Emmett baby? What are those?" Well I didn't expect Rosalie to know what it was. She's probably never used one in her life...

"CONDOMS!" Emmett bursted out. Bella's eyes widened and she looked at Nessie. I shook my head and Bella sighed, relieved.

"Since when do we used condoms? And why do we have so many?" Emmett must have had at least a hundred in that bag... Makes you wonder...

"I've been saving them. I never knew what for but now I know!" Emmett jumped up in down. He was thinking about the dare and how fun it was going to be. Then I heard a stop in his thoughts. All of a sudden he was thinking about hot dogs. I slapped my forehead. _Idiot..._

"Can I get a hot dog at the mall?" Emmett asked.

"CAN YOU JUST TELL ME THE FLIPPIN' DARE, MAN?!" Jacob shouted. Flippin'? Who says "flippin'" anymore?

"Dude. Chill! Okay. You have to hand these out to everyone and tell them to be safe!" Everyone laughed. Except for Jake.

"EW!" He screeched. That sent us into another fit of laughter because he sounded like a girl. "That is sooo wrong!"

"You have... to do... it man!" Emmet said between fits of giggles.

"Fine."

(At the mall)

We walked into the mall with Jacob carrying the bag. Emmett was laughing the whole way here and chanting he is a genius. Except he was pronouncing it like "genuous". Everyone was rolling their eyes about the way he was saying it and their thoughts were like, _That's how he was pronouncing it in the tree in front of Mike's house._

Emmett ran over to the stage where I guessed performers were going to be playing later tonight. What us Emmett doing?

"HEY EVERYONE! MY NAME IS EMMETT CRYSTAL BUTTERFLY RAINBOW... JUNIOR!" We all rolled out eyes at his made up name. "AND I HAVE A SONG I WOULD LIKE TO DEDICATE TO SOMEONE _VERY_ SPECIAL NAMED," I cringed at his thoughts, "BELLA SWAN CULLEN!" He jumped up and down. Bella's eyes widened as Emmett came down, grabbed her wrist and pulled her up to the stage

"THE SONG I WILL SING FOR HER IS CALLED BUTTONS BY THE PUSSYCAT DOLLS!" Bella's face would have been burning up by now... Emmett started singing.

"I'm telling you to  
Loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh)  
But you keep fronting (Uh)  
Saying what you going to do to me (Uh huh)  
But I ain't seen nothing

Typical  
Hardly the type I fall for  
I like when the physical  
Don't leave me asking for more  
I'M A SEXY MAMA! (Mama)  
Who knows just how to get what I want (Want)  
What I want to do is spring this on you (On you)  
Back up all of the things that I told you (Told you) "

The music stopped and Bella was standing there with her mouth wide open. Emmett was smiling at a job well done. _Hehe! I love embarrassing my sister! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Time for Jake's dare!_ Emmett jumped off the stage, carrying Bella bridal style and threw her to me. Literally. I barely caught her. Once I kissed her and put her down, Emmett was forcing Jake into position and telling him to start.

A girl who was about 15 walked up to Jake and started to flirt. Then he whipped out a condom and grinned at her.

"Be safe, little girl. You don't want your mama to find out what you've been doing!" He shoved the condom into her hand and she ran away. We all snickered. Then an old women who was in about her sixties walked by. Jake ran up to her and stopped her.

"Ma'am, I do believe you'll need one of these tonight. Oh and be safe!" She looked at what he was holding and snatched it from his hand.

"Thank you son. I've been walking all around the mall, trying to find where they sell these!" Then she simply walked away and pocketed the condom. Emmett bursted out laughing.

***

Twenty minutes later and either people had looked at Jake crazy or ran away. Nothing exciting happened until a girl approached Jake, trying to flirt like the first girl did.

"Hi. You might need to be safe tonight." Jake handed her a condom.

"Maybe you'd like to be safe with me." She whispered as seductively as she could. It wasn't really working.

"Wow there girl! I might need to steel that from you for my sister, Bella tonight!" Emmett barged in at grabbed the condom. He walked over to where Bella, Nessie, and I were sitting. Bella's face turned from shock to horror. Everyone in the food court turned and stared at her.

"HERE LITTLE SISSY! I THOUGHT YOU AND EWARD WOULD NEED ONE TONIGHT!" Emmett handed it to her and I hissed at him. _Sorry, bro! Just trying to have fun!_ He laughed and walked away.

"You guys... I'm out. I guess the dare is over!" Jake came over to us and Alice whined.

"But I only got to shop for 25 minutes!" She put on her puppy dog eyes. Not going to work.

"Alright, let's go!" Bella practically dragged Nessie and me out.

**A/N- Yay! Finally! Okay, I know it wasn't too funny but I am having writers block! Sorry! Anyways, ideas for Edward please? Review!**


	8. Don't have too much fun!

**A/N- Okay, sorry it's been a while... I was sooo busy this week! Mitchy, you asked how long this story will be. I have no idea. When everyone has been dared at least once it will be over! And sorry, last chapter wasn't too funny. Edward is serious and not really funny so it's hard to write something funny from his POV.**

**Thanks for all the reviews!**

**Chapter 7**

_Bella POV_

It was Jake's turn to dare someone. Emmett was jumping on the couch while Rosalie was trying to control him. Hopefully Emmet won't be embarrassing me anymore tonight.

"Nessie are you tired?" Edward was probably reading her mind.

"Yeaaah" She yawned in the middle of her sentence.

"Alright. I think we should pick up on this game tomorrow. Jake, Nessie, Bella, and I are going back to our house. The rest of you can stay here." I sighed.

"Why can't we play the game? It's not like we need sleep or anything!" Adeen was as narrow-mined and vain and Rose could be sometimes.

"Jake and Nessie need sleep. And Jake has no clue what his dare will be. So we'll give him the rest of the night to think." Edward is always the reasonable one.

Nessie, Jake, Edward, and I stood up and started walking out the door.

"DON'T HAVE TOO MUCH FUN EDDIE-KINS!" Emmett was screaming after us.

"Same to you Emmy!" Edward shouted back. That shut him up.

***

It was the morning and I was going through the closet that would have haunted my dreams if I could dream. I finally found a pair of jeans and a tight-fitting tee shirt. Well, at least it wasn't a dress.

"Come on mom! Jake has a really good dare and this is going to be so funny!" Nessie was jumping up and down giggling.

I looked at Edward and he grimaced. I raised my eyebrows and he answered the unspoken question.

"They both keep singing different songs over and over in their heads so I don't know what the dare is. All I know is that it has something to do with a popular show called American Idol..." My eyes widened. Hopefully that didn't mean someone singing on the show.

We got to the house and walked inside. Alice was practically dying, laughing. Edward shot her a glare and sat down on the couch, pulling me into his lap.

"What's so funny, Alice?" Nessie asked.

"The... dare! I... can't believe... how... funny it is!" Alice was laughing in between each word. I looked at Edward.

"I have no idea what the dare is because she's repeating the names of all her favorite stores in her head." Edward growled.

"Hurry up! I want to know the dare!" Emmett whined.

"Okay, Jake. Time for revenge!" Nessie skipped over to the side of the couch and, gracefully, plopped down on the floor. Jake followed her.

"Edward." He grinned evilly. _Oh no! What does he have planned for him?!_

"Dare." Edward said without thinking. His eyes widened and he glared at Jasper. _Is Jasper teaming up on Edward and me?_

"Yay! This is going to be great! Woohoo!" Alice was dancing around the living room. Edward tensed besides me.

"NO! I REFUSE TO DO THAT! NO!" Edward stood up, knocking me off his lap. I landed on the ground with a _thump_. Ouch! _I thought vampires couldn't be hurt!_

Alice, Jasper(who had been clued in by Alice), Nessie, and Jake were rolling on the floor laughing.

"Can someone please tell me what is going on?!" Rose stood up.

"I DARE EDWARD TO SIGN UP FOR AMERICAN IDOL AND DEDICATE THE SONG HE IS GOING TO SING TO MIKE!" Jake yelled. _Uh oh._

"Whoa! That is an awesome dare! I wish I could have dared you that!" Emmett jumped up.

"What song is he going to sing?" I asked.

Alice, Jake, and Nessie screamed, "KISS ME BY NEW FOUND GLORY!"

**A/N- I know it's short... I just was too tired to finish this. Even though it's 2 in the afternoon. I really want to go watch Prince Caspian again! That movie is sooo good! Has anyone read the books? If you did, do Caspian and Susan get back together in one of the books? I know the third movie is already being made because I looked it up but I would reaaally like to know if they end up together! So review please!**


	9. What the French toast!

**A/N-Sorry again. My week has been crazy! And tonight I have to go to this stupid fine arts festival for my chorus. I hate solos. I'm so sick of singing them! Because then I have to show up at every chorus event early just to practice a few lines! UGH! Oh well, haha. Anyways, I was planning on not updating until I got 50 reviews... But I only got 49. So I waited a while and I NEVER GOT THE 50TH REVIEW! Come one people!**

**Chapter 8**

_Emmet's POV_

OH! This was going to be great! I couldn't believe that the dog had come up with a dare so good! It was amazing! HAHAHAHAHA! Edward is sooo mad! Maybe I should make him MADDER! Wait, is madder even a word? Oh well!

_YOU GET THE BEEEST OF BOTH WORLDS! CHILLEN OUT TAKE IT SLOW, THEN YOU ROCK OUT THE CROW! YOU GET THE-_

"EMMETT! Stop singing! AND IT'S NOT CROW! A crow is a bird! IT'S SHOW! Idiot..." Edward screamed.

_Hehe! Time to make this even worse! _I started picturing me and Rose's "fun" last night. That was amazing. I lover her. And it was especially great when-

"GROSS EMMETT! STOP!" Edward smacked me on the head. OUCH!

Yes! There's the building for American Idol! WOOHOO! I'm going to embarrass Bella sooo much when she finds out I signed up myself too! HAHA! I'm going to sing "Like A Virgin" by MADONNA! SHE IS SUCH A GREAT SINGER CHICK! And Bella will be totally embarrassed! Especially when I bring her into the room and look strait in her eyes! HA!

OH LOOK THERE'S MIKE! I love Alice's powers. She got to see Jessica dragging Mike to American Idol with her so she could try out! So we could know what day and exactly what time Mike was going to be here!

"Okay Edward. You are number 568. Good luck!" Alice shoved a piece of paper with his number on it and pushed him towards the seats.

_-2 hours later-_

GOOD LORD! WHY IS THIS TAKING SO LONG! AGHH! HOLY CANOLES! THIS IS SO STUPID!

"Relax, Emmet. I'm next is next." Alice stood up, pulling Eddie-kins along with her. Mmmm... Brownies! YUM! Oh wait. I forgot. What is Alice doing?

She tapped yucky Mike's shoulder and he spun-LITERALLY SPUN(I know! Cool, right?) around and screamed when he saw my sister. Hehe. These humans' reactions are so weird!

"WHAT THE FRENCH TOAST?!" Whoa. Did Mike really just say that? I guess mike's "What the French toast" is the new "Flippin" that Jake said the other day!

"Mike! Hey, there! Edward has something to show you!" Alice jumped up and down.

"THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!" I ran over and screamed. At a human pace, don't worry! Rosalie jogged over and slapped me on the shoulder.

"Emmett! Go sit down!" Alice pushed me away.

"Anyway, follow him and he will lead you to the surprise." She winked at Edward and sat down on the chair next to me.

Mike didn't look to happy. Edward started walking forward and Mike followed. Then we all sneakily- sneakily? THAT WILL BE MY NEW FAVORITE DARE!- followed them. Alice was giggling the whole way.

Edward stopped in front of the doors that lead to the room where Simon Cowel was sitting. HOLY GUACAMOLE! OMGEEE! SIMON COWEL IS SITTING IN THE OTHER ROOM! AND RANDY- MY DOOOOG- JACKSON! Wow! This is crazy!

Edward grabbed Mike's hand and pulled him into the room. Mike's face was completely priceless. We all ran into the room behind them and stood at the door. Mike was trying to yank his hand away from Edward's but he's not as strong as us all-mighty vampies! Ha! I made a new word! YES!

"Hello... Edward Cullen. What are you singing for us?" Paula chirped up. Simon and Randy were to stunned to speak. I guess they weren't expecting someone to come in holding another man's hand! HAHAHAHAHA!

"Hey. I'm singing Kiss Me by New Found Glory... And I dedicate the song to my one true love, Mike Newton." At that, I cracked up laughing! THIS WAS TOO FUNNY!

And then he started to sing. You could tell he was having trouble singing with a terrible voice. Vampires are supposed to have good voices.

"Kiss me, beneath the bearded barley

Nightly, besides the green, green grass

Swing, Swing, swing your spinning step

I'll wear those shoes and you will wear that dress

O-oh! Kiss me! Beneath the milky twilight

Lead me! Out on the moonlit floor!

Lift your open hand!

Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance,

Silver moon sparkling!

SO KISS ME MIKE!"

We all bursted out laughing. Mike's eyes widened. We laughed more. Simon Cowel's mouth was hanging open. Randy and Paula were laughing into each other. This was priceless!

"So do I get a golden ticket?" Edward looked at Simon.

"ONLY IF YOU GIVE HIM A BLOW JOB!" I ran over where Edward was and pushed him out of the way.

"I'M NEXT! I KNOW THAT BECAUSE I ALSO SIGNED UP! AND I'M JUST SAVING YOU THE TROUBLE OF CALLING ME IN! I'M SINGING LIKE A VIRGIN BY MADONNA AND I WILL ALSO BE DEDICATING IT TO MY BELLA-BOP PRINCESS!" I took the paper with my number out of my pocket and attached it to my shirt.

"I MADE IT THROUGH THE WILDERNESS!

SOMEHOW I MADE IT THROUGH!

DIDN'T KNOW HOW LOST I WAS UNTIL I FOUND YOU!

I WAS BEAT! INCOMPLETE!

I'D BEEN HAD! I WAS SAD AND BLUE!

BUT YOU MADE ME FEEL!

YEAH, YOU MADE ME FEEL...

SHINY AND NE-E-EW!

LIKE A VIRGIN!

TOUCHED FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME!

LIKE A VIIR-IR-IR-IRGIN!

WHEN YOUR HEART BEATS...

NEXT TO MINE!

GONNA GIVE YOU ALL MY LOVE, BELLA!"

I didn't get to finish my song. Simon called security and they through us out of the building. I though I was in love with him. Then he had to go and ruin it by kicking me out. Stupid whore.

"THAT WAS SO FUNNY!" Alice yelled. She had been cracking up the whole time while Bella looked like her eyes were going to explode out of their sockets. Which reminds me, I need to ask Alice to buy me new socks...

Mike ran away as soon as he had the chance. So he only heard a part of my singing. The little bugger.

"Let's go home so Emmett can choose someone next." Edward growled. _Oh no, Eddie-kins! Bella is embarrassed! What will we ever do?!_ He turned and glared at me. It is so funny messing with him...

Then this random little girl walked up to Bella. What the heck?!

"Hi. My name is Caroline! I really want to enter this pageant but I have to have an older sister. Or anyone I look up to. And you're really pretty. I also know your dad is Officer Swan. So I was wondering if you would like to enter the Little Miss and Her Big Sis. beauty pageant with me." She was so cute! Curly blond hair with bright blue eyes!

"No she wouldn't like to help you sweetie. But I know someone who would! Her name is... Erika!" Edward looked over at me with an evil glint in his eyes. Why? I don't know! I'm not like a super smart rocket science dude!

"Hold on, sweetheart! I'll go get her! She is over in that store!" Alice pointed to girls shopping store. I want to meet this Erika. How come everyone but me knows her.

"Okay. Sure." The little girl smiled at Alice.

"Alright-y! We'll meet you at the pageant around... three? I can give you a make over and help you with your outfits and everything!" Alice was jumping up and down. She grabbed my hand and pulled me into the store. Everyone followed and Caroline went back over to her mom.

"Okay Edward! Choose the next person!" Alice smiled.

"Alright. Emmet." He looked at me.

"NO THAT'S NOT FAIR! YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE SOMEONE WHO HASNT BEEN PICKED YET!" Adeen stood up and pocked Edward in the chest.

"No! You'll like this! It's going to be hilarious! Emmett! Choose truth or dare!" Alice looked at me.

"Jeez Louise you guys! You all know that I'll pick dare unless it involves me cross-dressing!" I giggled. And it wasn't a manly giggle. That made me giggle even more! I crack myself up, man!

"So... do you pick dare?" Alice asked.

"YES! I FLIPPIN PICK DARE!" Everyone rolled their eyes at me.

"What? So I can't say flippin but you can?!" Jacob started walking towards me.

"Oh shut up! Go play fetch or do whatever you dogs dogs with your spare time!" Rosalie screeched at him. That shut him right up. No one can withstand the raging fury of my sex goddess! HA! TAKE THAT MUT!

"Okay. Emmett I dare you to dress as a girl and pretend to be Erika for Caroline in the pageant." I looked at Edward. WHAT?! I said no cross-dressing! Why can't I just go naked?!

"Because Rose with jump up on the stage with you and do some inappropriate things that are not meant for 6-year-olds' eyes." Edward. Well maybe I want that to happen Eddie-poo! He gave me a "shut up" look.

"Okeedokee! TIME TO GO SHOPPING!" Alice looked at me evilly. _Uh oh..._

**A/N- HAHAHAHAHA! I can't wait to write the next chapter! But I have to go to the Fine Arts Festival! It doesn't start until 7 but I have to go early to practice my solo... UGH! Anyway, review!**


	10. Save me from the sexily scary vampie!

**A/N- Awh! Thanks you guys for the "good lucks"!!!! And it was a very boring Fine Arts Festival. It was in our gym and we had to sit on the bleachers. Then, when we had to sing we had to get up and walk over to the stands. It was so annoying! Anyways, my solo went great and it was funny because some chorus director dude was there so he heard my solo in "Ose Shalom"! So I'm excited that he'll like ask me to join a famous choir or something! Wouldn't that be great?! Anyways, here's the next chapter!**

**Chapter 9**

_Emmett's POV(I think Emmett is going to have a lot of POVs in the rest of this story...)_

I think I know what Bella feels like whenever she is dragged to the mall by Alice. IT WAS TERRIBLE! At least Alice go me the socks I needed... YAY!

OH! And I got a hot dog! FINALLY! But I couldn't eat it... stupid vampire disabilities! So I copied myself from yesterday with the ice cream. I just smushed my hot dog all over Bella. It was funny!

_MAY HE POOP ON MY KNEE? MAY HE POOP ON MY KNEE? KITTY ALL GO SEE MUCH A FINNY-D! COULD YOU TELL IT TO HER MAID, AND SEE ME BE? WON'T YOU MUSTARD MY HOLE WITH A GENIE BABE? WON'T YOU MUSTARD MY HOLE WITH A GENIE BAAABE? OOOH..... COLA! _Man, I love that song! Jasper found it on youtube this morning before Bella and Eddie came over! It was so funny**!(A/N-Sorry that is my friend's and I's favorite song on youtube! HAHA!) **

"Emmett! I found a perfect purse to match that outfit!" Alice ran over to me and handed me the purse. It was pink with little tan D&B's all over it. They were kind of annoying! But it went with the pink collared Hollister shit I was wearing so... Yeah. And this skirt was riding up my butt! How do girls wear these things?**!(A/N- A question I ask myself every time I'm forced into one of those God forsaken things...)**

I was also wearing pink, sparkly pumps. I didn't understand why girls complained about them so much! They were actually very comfortable! Rose had forced a stuffed bra on my too. Now we were going to a wig store. They wanted to get me a blond wig.

"HEY BELLA? YOU NEVER TOLD ME HOW MUCH FUN YOU AND EDDIE-KINS HAD LAST NIGHT! DID YOU USE PROTECTION?!" I grabbed Bella and picked her up.

"Put her down, Emmett!" Rose came over and smacked me on the head. I just dropped Bella and grabbed Rose instead. As soon as I had her in my arms we were making out.

"YUCK! GO GET A ROOM!" Jake screamed. I laughed.

"Go away, dog!" Rose yelled at him.

Alice finally came out of the wig thing place and threw me a bag. I looked inside and pulled out a Hannah Montanan-ish looking wig. IT WAS SOOOO COOL! I was going to look so hardcore for this dare!

"Hopefully it fits his big, empty head." I heard Jacob whispering to Nessie.

"Who are you talking about Jakey-poo!?" I asked him.

"Erika." He replied. Oh yeah. That girl I was impersonating! Why haven't I met her yet?!

"How come everyone here knows this Erika chick except for me. It's not fair!" I pouted and crossed my arms over my chest.

"Because, Emmett. Erika is you!" Edward explained. But I'm not a girl! If I am that means Rose is... LESBIAN?! WHA?!

"No you idiot. Erika is a made up person. You are pretending to be her!" Edward yelled.

"Oooh. So Rose isn't a lesbo?" I asked.

"EMMETT!" Rose kicked me in the stomach. I screamed.

"BELLA! SAVE ME FROM THE SEXILY SCARY VAMPIE LADY ABOUT TO EAT ME!" I jumped onto Bella who fell on the ground. HA! She isn't stronger than me anymore! YES! WOOHOO!

"Emmett! Get off me! People are staring!" Bella hissed at me. I dragged her into a dressing room(since we were in the mall) and closed the door. Bella stared at me wierdly.

"UH! OH! OW! UH!" I started making weird noise and Bella's eyes widened. Edward barged in the dressing room, grabbed Bella, and pulled her away. I was mad! Then I looked at the people standing outside the dressing room's faces! THEY WERE HISTARICAL! I was dying laughing!

"Emmett! That was sick! Get over here!" Rose gave me a death glare. Oops!

After a long punishment from Rose, Alice dragged me to the pageant. Caroline was sitting at a table with a mirror backstage. Alice ran up to her and gave her a hug.

"CAROLINE! THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN! Come on! I have a perfect outfit for your first round! It's sports! I got you and Erika tennis outfits!" She squealed and handed us both a tennis outfit. "Go get dressed and when you come back, I'm doing hair and makeup!" She squealed again. Bella flinched. I laughed.

I went to the dressing room and changed into the short skirt and tiny tennis shirt. Then I put on some plain white sneakers and looked at myself in the mirror. _Not bad... Maybe I should cross-dress more often!_

I went to Alice and she immediately started on my wig. Once she was done giving me pigtails on the top of my head, she threw some blush, eyeshadow, and mascara on me. Then Caroline walked out. _AWWHH!!! SHE IS SO CUTE!_ She was wearing a mini version of what I had on and he hair was already in curly pigtails. She was wearing the same kind of make up as me. I thought she looked like a mini me! Except... more feminine.

"Wow! You are pretty! And very big!" She came over and hugged me.

I put on a high pitched voice. "Thank you Caroline!" I shot a glare at Edward. I didn't like this dare. Alice grabbed a white plastic bag and smiley evilly at me. What now?

"Erika! This is your dress for the last round! It's adorable! You'll love it!" Alice put the plastic bag with the dress in it down.**(A/N-Dress link on profile)**

"Why don't I get to see it?" I asked.

"Because I said so." Alice stuck her tongue out at me. Bella smirked at me.

"And next, we have Caroline and Erika!" The announcer dude called us out.

_Bella's POV_

HA! This is so funny! I'm sooo glad Edward came up with this idea! It was amazing! Emmett is so embarrassed! And I can't wait to see him in the God awful dress that Alice got him! I wonder what he'll do for the talent show! Hopefully Caroline won't be mad about the whole cross-dresser big sister.

Emmett walked out with Caroline. He was striking over-the-top poses and swinging his hips as much as he could when walking. I started giggling.

They walked back behind the stage and Alice dressed them in disco-ey, sparkly diva outfits. IT WAS SO FUNNY!

Then, Emmett went back out on stage with Caroline and they started singing Brittney Spear's "Stronger". That sent me into another round of giggles. Alice was rolling around on the floor laughing.

Emmett finished and walked back behind the curtains to a grinning Alice holding up the ugliest dress I had ever seen.

"NO WAY! I REFUSE TO WEAR THAT! NO! NO! NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!" Emmett was stomping his feet, simultaneously. He looked like a really mad cartoon character.

"You have to. It's part of the dare!" Adeen grabbed the dress, gloves, and shoes and shoved Emmett into a dressing area.

Emmett came out in the outfit and I bursted out laughing. Alice sat him down and ordered Rose to curl his wig. Alice started working on Caroline. Poor girl. She couldn't win because of Emmett.

"And last, we have Caroline and Erika in their dresses!" The announcer called Emmett and Caroline out.

"Well, I better make the most of this!" Emmett whispered and skipped onto the stage.

"Everyone! You all know I am Erika and that I am an amazing singer because I already showed you how good at singing I am. But, you don't know my sister Bella! She is almost as good as me and I want you all to hear her sing! She'll be singing 'Don't Cha' by the Pussy Cat Dolls!" My jaw dropped and my eyes widened. Emmett pulled me out on the stage and the music started. I walked over to Emmett, hit him on the head, and ran backstage.

"Awh. Looks like she's shy! Oh well! By!" Emmett ran backstage.

"Bella! You mad me look bad!" Emmett started whining.

"Erika! Go with Caroline out on the stage! The judges are announcing the winners!" Alice pushed Emmett out with Caroline.

"AND THE WINNERS ARE.....-drum rolls- ERIKA AND CAROLINE!" The announcer said.

"OH THANK YOU OH THANK YOU OH THANK YOU!" Emmett jumped on top of the judge and hugged him. Caroline tried to pull him off and the judges had to call security on Emmett. So, we were kicked out. _Again._

**A/N- Okay, I decided the next chapter will be the last because this story is losing it's funny-ness and I really want to start on another story! **

**I want it to be about the Cullens, Hales, and Bella all go to a boarding school and none of the families know each other yet. They will be vampires(except Bella). It's just that none of them are together yet and the Hales(Rose&Jasper) have some other vampires with them. The boarding school is going to be like a music and art school! Wouldn't that be cool? And I also want it to be a cross-over with Maximum Ride! I think it will be amazing! Haha, so review! **


	11. CDawg and ESizzle!

**Chapter 10**

_Bella's POV_

Once Emmett had decided he had embarrassed himself enough at the show, we went home. The rest of the truths and dares were uneventful. Everyone chose truth from that point on and we started running out of truths.

"Carlisle and Esme will be home it twenty minutes you guys! If they ask what we did, we forced the boys to take us shopping." What? Why couldn't they know about us playing truth or dare? I planned in my head to ask her when we got home.

"No need to wait until we get home, dear Bella. We can't tell Carlisle and Esme because we were banned from playing truth or dare. Last time, Emmett ended up stripping in front of 4th graders. We had to run away from the neighborhood and move because the parents were going crazy. Oh and before Emmett stripped, we dared Eddie to teach Sex Ed. to a bunch of 2nd graders." Oh. Well that explains things a bit.

Right then, Emmett bursted out laughing. Adeen and Keelyn started giggling to themselves. What's so funny about... Ohhh. I started to giggle, picturing Edward teach a Sex Ed. class.

"Stop laughing you guys! It wasn't that funny!" Edward whined.

"Wait. How are Carlisle and Esme going to believe we went shopping when we have no bags to prove it?" Adreana was so logical and serious when it involved things like this.

"I already bought tons of stuff for us all last night when we were at the mall. OH! Nessie, I got you the coolest dress ever!" Unlike me, Renesmee enjoyed dressing up and shopping for clothes.

"Oh thank you Alice! Can I see it?" Alice grabbed Nessie's hand and dragged her upstairs.

The front door opened and Carlisle stepped in with Esme.

"HEY C-DAWG AND E-SIZZLE!"

**A/N-Haha. This is the end. Not very creative but I thought I'd just give you the end so I could start my next fanfic story. If anyone can guess who said the last line then... hmmm... YOU WILL WIN A FREE BEAR HUG FROM EMMETT! Woohoo! YAY! Bella may not like them but I'd love one:)**

**Review!**


	12. SEQUEL NEWS!

A/N

Alrighty! I decided to do a sequel to this story.

I had a lot of complaints about Emmett being to dumb in Truth or Dare so I'll be sure to make him smarter, but funny in the sequel.

I already started writing the sequel. It's going to be called Cullen Prank Week! The rules and how to play the game will be described in the first two chapters.

I'm sorry if it's going to be a bit serious... but yeah. Emmett is more serious so that makes the few chapters without pranks... not so funny... But I already have LOADS of pranks planned! They will all be hilarious and the reactions to!

Although, if anyone has played a prank on friends, families, or people they hate I'd love to hear about them! It could help me with figuring out more pranks when I run out!

Also, some of you might have read my other story I am also writing right now. On the last chapter I included an idea of a story that I want to start(after midterms week; which is next week). Even if you haven't read it I'll put it here and you tell me what you think of it:

Peace and Serenity- Bella is a different kind of magical creature. She is a Serenity. Her powers are unlimited and her weaknesses are non-existent. One problem is: humans hunted Serenities and vampires wanted to rip every single one of them apart. There can only be 7 Serenities in the whole universe(and more) at a time. Bella is the oldest out of all of them, stuck in an 18 year old body. What happens when she nearly escapes the Volturi and comes to live in a little town called Forks? Will love bloom between Edward and Bella? Or will her being a vampire-hated Serenity get in the way?

So how does it sound? I already have the whole power thing figured out and where Serenities come from and what their purposes are... blaaah... blah blaaah... blah blaaah.... And I promised the 10th reviewer of chapter 6 in that story that I'd PM them, telling about her powers, where she's from, and her purpose!

So I'm going to put up the first 2 chapters of Cullen Prank Week! Make sure to check it out when I get them up! They don't have pranks in them yet but it does have the scene setting and rule giving:)

Bye-a! And review to tell me what to you thing of Cullen Prank Week and Peace and Serenity!

-BellissaAdreana

P.S.- Haha. Everyone who thought Emmett was the one who said C-dawg and E-sizzle at the end was CORRECT! I mean, who else could it be? Haha. Love you guys!


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